The thing about cancer is that you start to see things so clearly. You never know what tomorrow brings. I am here. You are here. It is now that matters. The past is the past, and the future is yet to be determined. It has become so obvious to me that all you need in life is health. Health is everything. There is nothing standing in your way if you are healthy. Nothing. The fear, the doubt, the people, the mountains and valleys that keep you back from your dreams are simply obstacles. You can accomplish anything if you have your health. Anything. You probably won’t realize this until you are old and weary, or young and sick. I urge you to put aside all of your reasons (no matter how good they are) and go for whatever it is you most desire. Don’t psyche yourself out (or let others). That’s half the battle. I’m not saying it will be easy. Time is running out though. I guarantee you this. I was just living my life, like you, and bam.. slapped in the face with the cancer stick (or something like that).
I’ve always been a go getter. Certain of every path I have been down. When things didn’t work out, and my path changed… I was certain of the new path. I’ve always had drive, always had courage, and this is still my shining light through the darkness. Uncertainty though is looming at every corner. Not necessarily the uncertainty of a future filled with opportunities, and mystery..the future is unknown for every single one of us. It’s the uncertainty of whether I can wake up with enough energy to make it through a typical day. Then I add on all of the things I want to do, nothing big. Carnivals, beach days, outings in the city, road trips, playing with my kids outside. I just hope I have the stamina. I worry if I’ll make it an hour, less than an hour, can I even do it at all? It’s one of the most frustrating things I have ever dealt with. I’m here. I’m alive. I just want to live fully. It’s a constant battle in conquering defeat. Health is the foundation for everything.
Don’t get me wrong though, my smile is genuine and my heart is full. With all of my bad luck I have also been fortunate. I mean, I’m still here. I’ve been battling for quite a while. I am ready to be on the other side of this disease, even for a moments time, just to live again. It’s so simple. It’s not a question whether I live or die. We all live and die. I just want to Live Fully while I’m here. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, and all I’ve ever done. I’m not sitting on the couch moping, lying on my bed crying. I am dragging my tired, sorry ass all over the place because I’m not giving up. I won’t. I’m going to get well. The worst is yet to come for me, and if I make it out alive and well, that will only make the rest to come that much better. If you are healthy, there is nothing stopping you now. So, get going.
The Thing About Cancer... 